Health Tips

Loving your children

While loving your children comes naturally from the outflow of your heart, sometimes we fail to show them that we do love them. Children perceive differently and even though we discipline them for their good, they might not see it that way at that time, which makes it vital for us to explain why we discipline them. Parenting in today’s world is more challenging than before, with the presence of social media, the upcoming generation are very different. However, children still need to know that they are loved. Actually, all the more they need to know that they are loved because they will always subconsciously compare themselves to everyone online. Did I mention that parenting is hard? 

How is this a health tip? Personally, I believe that nurturing and loving children are part and parcel of a healthy growing environment. It is important for their mental health, probably ours too. Heard of the 5 love languages?  Well, here are some practical tips for you to love them intentionally and gracefully. While you can generally apply all of the below, each individual perceives love differently. And it might be wise to determine what their love language is and focus a bit more in that area. 

*although the focus is on children, this is applicable to anyone (ie. spouse, family, friends)

1. Quality Time

Spending quality time is undeniably important. It is harder in this day and age as technology has taken over our lives. But we can strike a balance. Put down your devices. When you are with your children, look them in the eye and talk to them. It can be over dinner or while you are doing chores together. Get messy together once in awhile. Let children be children. Find recreational activities to do together. It is the small things in life that matters, believe me that they will look back and cherish this moment in future.

2. Acts of Service

Acts of service is one of the kindest things to do, it does not have to be big. It can be fixing a toy, reading books for them, leaving a special note or teaching them certain things. It is the random mindful thoughts of love translated into action. The best part about this is that you never know if your small gesture of love will light up their day or help them through a rough day. Do not give up doing good when it is in your power to do so.

3. Affirming Words

Words carry life (and death). The words that we speak can make or break them. Choose to tell them that you love them. Tell them what you love about them or what they did that touched your heart. Or how they brought so much joy into your life. Affirmation is something humans look for in their lives. 

4. Giving Gifts

Giving gifts may sound expensive but it does not have to be so. It can be sharing a dessert together, making a personal card or item, giving them an extra chocolate or cookie (not too much sweet food all the time though) or even picking flowers. It can be a rewarding gift as well if they have achieved something or went through something difficult. Again, it is the thought that counts but through small acts of giving. 

5. Physical Touch

Last but not least, physical touch is important as well. It can be morning hugs before school or night hugs before bed or even kisses. Holding their hands or snuggling them. There is something about the human touch that no device or technology (or even robot) can replace. Giving them a pat on the back when you compliment them is also part of the human touch. 

There are so many ways that we can show love to our children, family and friends. It is a conscious effort but a worthwhile one. After all, it is relationships that really matter at the end of the day.

You would never know if your acts of love can help someone out of depression, give them the motivation to carry on because they know they are loved and cared for. 

On a side note, remember that disciplining them is also an act of love. 

Little acts of love go a long way.

Download our Doc2Us app from Google Play Store or Apple Store and chat with a doctor now.

Reference: 

1. The 5 love languages by Dr Gary Chapman

Picture credit:

1. https://www.escoffieronline.com/how-to-start-cooking-with-your-kids/

2. https://www.parentingforbrain.com/children-hugging/

3. https://leaderonomics.com/personal/sincere-words-of-affirmation-are-effective

4. https://www.pcma.org/be-smart-about-gift-giving/

Written by

Dr. Jessamine Chong Sze Lynn